No Air

Earlier this evening I was recounting to an acquaintance this horrible childhood experience I had called "Frost Valley." It was a children's campsite about 45 minutes away in extreme rural New York, and in 5th grade, I was forced to spend three (3) days and two (2) nights there with the entire 5th grade class of Arlington Elementary school. He blinked his eyes in astonishment and said, "they did that back then too?"

He explained that he's a counselor and every late spring his sessions with school kids are bi-weekly, hour-long descriptions of feeling helpless and scared and being unable to breathe.

"Yeah," I nodded. "That's because it's terrible."

Somehow, knowing that generations after me remember Frost Valley with chagrin made me feel better, and it made me think that maybe a support group would be a good idea.

So, Dear Reader: 

• Have you ever been dragged along to a site in the wilderness with questionable toilets (outhouses) along with 250 of your peers who all seemed to be on speed at the age of 10?
• Did you break into a cold sweat when they told you to pair off for canoeing?
• Did you feel sweet relief when the adult teachers would engage you in conversation?
• Did you stare longingly at the girls in your bunk french braiding each other's hair, but when one really decent human being offered to do yours it was painfully awkward because you just sat there in silence?
• Were you mystified when they started playing M.A.S.H?
• Did you wish you had been able to bring about 500 books?
• Did this happen AGAIN 3 years later when, despite clearly indicating that staying home would be preferable, your parents signed the permission slip and paid for you to go on the 8th grade Washington D.C. trip?
• And did you wonder what would be worse? Jumping from the bus or sitting through 75 13-year-olds singing along to Grease?

You're not alone!

Introducing a new group to help you deal with these experiences: The Survivors of School Enforced Socializing or S.S.E.S.

You don't have to talk to anyone if you don't want to! Bring all the books! Headphones are encouraged! Tea and cookies are completely self-serve so you never need to interact with anyone!

Group discussion will be facilitated via internet or with the next available furry/non-furry pet